In the good old days, everything seemed simple. If you had the hots for someone, you just had to talk to them and set up a date where you could get to know each other and decide if the spark was there.

Nowadays, things are... not so simple anymore. Honestly, it's a freaking minefield.

Not only are there countless apps to contend with, but now that we're isolating ourselves, dating for real is a no-no. This has led to some of the digital dating trends we're already familiar with reaching a new level.

But while there's no denying that it feels a bit depressing to be ghost-walked, backstabbed, or submerged, we're sticking to the rules here and naming these dating trends for what they are so you can spot them a mile away and say a big "no thanks."

Has the man or woman you went on a video chat date with stopped responding, but continues to like your pictures or watch your stories, and it's driving you crazy? Or how about that non-committal date who keeps you on your toes with emoji messages, but never puts their money where their mouth is?

We can tell you that you're not alone, and that the behavior that has you completely confused probably has a name. Take a look at our comprehensive dating lexicon and you might recognize some of these behaviors in your date - or even in yourself. 

Orbiting

Have you ever experienced an old flame slipping into your social media, piquing your curiosity with a series of non-committal likes or Instagram stories, only to never actually talk to you? Then you've been circled.

The term derives from ghosting and describes the search for attention on social media by someone who suddenly stops responding to your messages, but continues to sporadically like your pictures, retweet your tweets or view your Stories.

We spoke with We-Vibe's relationship expert, Dr. Becky Spelman, to get her take on why someone might engage in this kind of confusing behavior.

Spelman suspects that some of the possible thought processes behind orbiting are, "There could be a number of factors at play. Perhaps the person feels that they are treating the other person more gently if they maintain some contact in this way, and think they are being kinder than if they just cut off contact altogether.

"They may feel that by keeping this low level of interest, they are keeping their options open and that they can resume the relationship if the dating scene gets lean at some point in the future. They may be going through the photos in hopes that their egos will be boosted if they see signs of distress or despair on the other person's part, or they may simply take a voyeuristic pleasure in peering into those windows of their lives.

"Fortunately, there is no need to question or explore this behavior in detail, because we can respond to the incivility of ghosting by firmly removing the person in question from our online friend community and blocking future invitations from them!"

Soft Ghosting 

We've all heard of ghosting (if you haven't, you'll find a detailed description below), but what if someone doesn't reply to your messages (implying that they're opting out of the conversation), but continues to send responses (like likes or emojis) to your comments on their posts or messages?

That, dear readers, is a soft ghost. We spoke with Louise Troen, Vice President of International Media and Communications at Bumble (the dating app for women), to get her take on soft ghosting and how to deal with it.

Apparently, it's important to keep a level head and not jump to conclusions: "While technology has given us the ability to communicate all the time, that doesn't mean we're available all the time."

Troen recommends reaching out again if you're convinced you have a connection with that person, and if they're from a different country than you, consider cultural differences or language barriers. She also believes it's helpful to be clear about what you want and make it clear that you want to arrange a meeting.

She adds, "If you haven't set up a meeting, it doesn't automatically mean you've been turned down. Some people need a clearer call to action, so ignoring the "like" messages and moving on to a meeting is a good step to gauge the seriousness of the message. Suggest a time and place and assess the response from there. If there's no response, it's probably a soft ghost and you can move on knowing it would have been a waste of time anyway."

Most importantly, Troen reminds us that if someone is so persistent that it negatively impacts your mood, you should put yourself first and leave the person alone. After all, if the person doesn't recognize a good thing when they get it, they're not worth your efforts anyway.

Fleabagging

When Fleabag hit theaters in 2016, we all fell head over heels in love with Phoebe Waller-Bridge's titular character. She was genuine, blunt, uncomfortably funny, and made a lot of understandable life choices - most of which fell under the theme of relationships, as she made a habit of dating men who were clearly not right or good for her.

It was riveting to watch her do it, not least because most of us have made the same mistakes at one time or another. Whether it's staying in a dysfunctional relationship far too long or choosing someone you know is trouble, none of us are immune from making bad decisions.

So what is fleabagging? Well, basically, the term refers to dating people we know aren't right for us. The term was coined by the dating website Plenty of Fish, whose experts found that women tend to "fleabag" much more often than men. According to the dating website, 63% of women admitted to doing it, compared to 38% of men.

If these statistics are to be believed, why do we like to chase after people we know are bad for us? There are plenty of reasons, but Gregory Louis Carter of Durham University believes it may have to do with the fact that our instincts respond to typically masculine traits that "bad boys" often seem to possess.

Carter explains that the kind of men we perceive as "bad boys" often exhibit character traits such as confidence, arrogance and charisma. He theorizes that "women respond to a man's ability to 'sell himself'; a useful tactic in a co-evolutionary 'arms race' in which men convince women to pursue their preferred sexual strategy." Hmm.

Cuffing 

When the weather gets colder and Christmas is suddenly upon us, single people often feel more drawn to a relationship. Maybe it's all the talk about "cuddling up" to watch the new Christmas shows on Netflix, or the prospect of seeing grandma on Boxing Day, who will definitely want to know why you're still single.

Either way, this has triggered a phenomenon known as "cuffing season," which lasts from November through March.

For those who haven't heard the term yet: "Cuffing" refers to entering into a relationship in the fall or early winter to enjoy the holidays with someone.

Psychology Today aptly described this phenomenon, "People feel lonelier during these months. That's because as the days get shorter and colder, people go straight home when they absolutely have to go to work, school or Starbucks. This makes it harder to socialize, and feelings of isolation can set in. For many, the solution to this problem is to find a guaranteed special someone.

How can you tell if someone wants you to stick around for the winter season? You may notice that he or she is overly eager to expedite the relationship, pushing for you to meet his or her already-married friends, inviting you to family gatherings, and putting lots of Christmas dates in the diary.

Ultimately, though, you can't guess a person's intentions or assume he or she has a relationship planned until spring. And as Psychology Today writes, "If you have a plan you're working on, such as getting to the next level in your career, a relationship will steal some of your focus. Don't let the temptations of bondage season keep you from doing what's important to you." Most importantly, take things at the pace you feel comfortable.

Grande-ing

We all knew Ariana Grande's breakup song Thank U, Next was big news at the time of its release, with a music video full of nostalgic movie references and flashy cameos. Since then, however, the song has become its own reference point to explain any situation where you feel empowered to move on, and the phrase "Thank U, Next" has popped up on many social media and Whatsapp groups.

Now the song has inspired a new, surprisingly positive dating trend: Grande-ing. The Huff Post reports that Grande's song has influenced a new way of thinking about breakups, encouraging millennials to respect and appreciate the positive aspects of their past relationships and use them to grow as a person. 

Essentially, the song inspires us to get more comfortable with our exes in order to let go of any bad feelings that may be holding us back when entering into future relationships. For a millennial dating trend, this all actually sounds pretty healthy.

Insta-Gator

This action can be done by either party - and you've probably seen it many times in your Instagram feed. Being an Insta-Gator means that one half of the couple uses their social media to take the relationship to the next level, showing their friends that they have a partner while also showing that partner that they are invested.

Deflexting 

Have you ever tried to discuss an important issue with someone you're dating and used a text message to facilitate the question? We've all been there. But whether you're trying to figure out where the relationship is going or you want to make sure you really have plans for the weekend, it's more than annoying when the person ignores the subtly asked question and instead responds to everything else in the message.  

Are they simply ignoring the question? Did they just forget about it? Sounds like they are deflexting.

Dracula-ing

What do we know about vampires? Well, they're deadliest at night, of course. These bloodsuckers suck the life out of you at night, and if you've ever received a sex call, you know that these traits are also found in those who think it's okay to come back on your radar when they want something purely sexual. 

In other words: If you only get messages from someone after dark, they're the closest thing to Dracula.

Scrooged

We all remember the mean old man in A Christmas Carol whose clenched fist deprived him of all the joys of the holiday season. Well, this dating trend is a bit like that, but instead of getting visits from ghosts of Christmas past, you're more likely to just get scrooged. 

According to a study by eharmony, nearly one in ten people have avoided getting involved with a partner just before Christmas so they don't have to buy them a gift - with men aged 18 to 24 being the most common. According to the survey, 11% of men (compared to 7% of women) pull back in the weeks leading up to Christmas before ending the relationship in time for the big day. Not exactly a picture of Christmas cheer, is it?

Rachael Lloyd, relationship expert at eharmony, says: "We know that relationships often lose meaning in the run-up to Christmas. It's also a time when dating slows down significantly. In fact, a quarter (24%) of Brits agree that family and friends are more important than a relationship during this time.

"However, it seems particularly stingy to end a relationship just to avoid buying your partner a gift, and suggests that you weren't ready for a romantic commitment in the first place. There is no excuse for this type of behavior. There are a variety of wallet-friendly gifts that some of these 'cheapskates' might consider before pulling the plug."

Ghosting

Ah, the mother of all Millennial dating trends. This story is as old as time itself. What was probably once called "the silent treatment" has been renamed "ghosting" to refer to the complete disappearance of a potential love interest from your life, without warning, almost as if they died.

This can happen at any time, from a few dates to the spectacular story of a woman who came home to find an empty house after her boyfriend took off without any notice.

This is a serious example, but ghosting usually happens when one person quite suddenly stops communicating with the other over texts, simply ignoring them. At this point, the person who is being ghosted is unlikely to hear from the ghost hunter in the near future, which leads us to the other dating trends....

Zombied

Sometimes when the person you're dating is going downhill, it's like they set off a twisted alarm in their head just as you start to get over them and the unfortunate interaction you shared.

It could be a fleeting text message pretending not to have noticed that you're no longer talking, or maybe it's a not-so-casual Facebook friend request or something similar. Basically, it's a nudge to say, "Hey, remember me?" just like a zombie returning from the dating dead.

Speaking to the Washington Post, dating coach Francesca Hogi explains the phenomenon: "As technology advances, it's becoming easier and easier to contact people out of the blue, and we're seeing it more and more," she says.

"All these casual ways of reaching out and contacting people give [people] permission to say, 'Hey, the risk is very low. She's not going to berate me on the phone and hurt my feelings.

' She's just going to ignore my text message."

So should we ignore the zombie - aka the nerd who is desperate to reconnect?

Hogi doesn't think we should be so cynical: Sometimes people really do miss out on relationships, make mistakes or reject people too quickly.

Addressing the potential zombies among us, she says, "If you're thinking about someone you've lost touch with or maybe ghosting, you should contact that person if you regret it or are curious, but you should acknowledge the passage of time and your responsibility for it.

And, perhaps most importantly, she adds, "just do it respectfully and like an adult."

Benching

While it's great to have an abundance of hungry singles at your fingertips when you're ready to meet someone, such a wide selection also leads to a bit of a problem. With another match just a swipe away, connections can lose meaning and feel easily replaceable.

This is where the term "benching" comes in, referring to the behavior of a person who is still looking in case someone "better" comes along. A "bencher" keeps you on your toes with nice responses, but scatters dates or interactions over several weeks to slow down the momentum.

In short, if you feel like you're just a substitute for someone because of their non-committal behavior, chances are they're benching you so you can step in when they have time.

Marleying

This dating trend applies specifically to the Christmas season, a time that is generally considered a time for cuddling and snuggling.

With Christmas just around the corner and engagement posts flooding the Instagram feed, some of us suddenly wish we had someone to kiss under the mistletoe. Combine this with oodles of mulled wine and the fact that you're returning to your hometown for a week, and you have a recipe for ex-disaster.

The term "marleying" was coined by dating website eHarmony and refers to people contacting their ex over Christmas in hopes of rekindling their romance for a fling - or more.

Dating expert Laura Yates explains the new trend by saying that Christmas is "synonymous with memories, romance, couples and goodwill," which can "trigger strong feelings of sadness, especially if you've just had a breakup."

She explains why so many people turn to their ex over the holidays, "You may compare this year to happier times when you were with your ex, forgetting what led to the breakup in the first place. That, in turn, leads to feeling vulnerable and a desire to relive those times - even if you have to settle for a few text messages.

Stashing

Let's imagine the situation: You've been talking to someone online and have moved on to a real date. Things are going pretty well. You've met your family, friends, and even some of your work colleagues - and everyone has hit it off.

But you haven't met a single person in their lives. Not a single one.

The confusing part is that they'll share a snapshot of your dinner together on Instagram - but they won't tag you in it. They check in on Facebook to that cool new bar you're hanging out at - but you're not in it. And they call their best friend to talk about their day - but your name is never mentioned.

If all of this sounds familiar, we've got news for you: you're being hidden. You're kept in a closet to be pulled out in good times, but not as a permanent part of their lives.

This is a classic trait of a commitment-shy person, and the optimists among us might argue that they will introduce you to other aspects of their life over time.