For many, the motto is: communication is the be-all and end-all! Especially in a partnership and in friendships, nothing works without talking ... actually in no area of ​​life. That's why it's all the more surprising that we're slacking off here over time. At least when it comes to our communication. The whole thing is then called Closeness Communication Bias. So that you understand what we are getting at and what is hidden behind the name, we will explain it to you now.

Closeness Communication Bias: That's behind it!

Closeness Communication Bias can be explained as follows: When we get to know a person, whether on a dating level or on a friendly basis, we make an especially great effort at the beginning - especially when it comes to communication. As time goes on, we tend to assume that our friends and partners understand us rather than strangers. The assumption is of course understandable in itself, but still not completely correct. Boaz Keysar, professor of psychology at the University of Chicago, found in a study that a couple's communication is subject to an illusion of insight.

Sometimes routine comes into everyday life and a relationship threatens to break up. Correct communication can be a way out of a crisis. Or you just show your loved one again who you love him or her very much.

That means: When we meet a stranger, we do not automatically assume that he or she understands us. So we go out of our way to communicate. We often mistakenly assume that people who are close to us understand us better. Therefore we communicate less clearly. We stop explaining things that are actually not really clear.

This is why it is particularly important in relationships to understand the following steps:

Thought is not said (step 1) Said is not heard (step 2) Heard is not understood (step 3) Understood does not agree (step 4)

How to escape the closeness communication bias!

There are two ways you can help yourself not to succumb to the illusion of insight. This includes:

Questioning: Even if it is sometimes annoying, you should never stop questioning what the other person really means. Even if you seem pretty sure, ask! This way you can prevent misunderstandings right from the start. Explain: Instead of questioning, you will sometimes find yourself in the other position. This is about explaining. If you tell your partner something, don't rely on him or her that he or she will “understand”. Play it safe and be really clear. Try to describe the situation, the matter, etc. to your counterpart as precisely as possible.

Many relationships fail because of poor or lack of communication. But there are many other relationship mistakes that are detrimental to love in the long run: